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The question as to whether it was a head-butt or drunken greeting was a point of fevered discussion which even elicited the question as to whether Bancroft would be good enough to grade it on a scale of 1-10 with one being an affectionate nuzzle and 10 being the full ‘Glasgow kiss’.

He declined to offer a mark for the record.

But behind the laughter and the jokes it was England not Australia who were feeling the effects of not one but two blows.

One, off the field, where they have been manoeuvred into a singularly uncomfortable position given they are already struggling to deal with the absence of Ben Stokes after another night out, and the other on it, where they lost the first Test in emphatic fashion.

It is no wonder Steve Smith could barely contain himself with laughter so much for him went right in Brisbane.

He scored 141 unbeaten runs, his side won by 10 wickets, his bowlers bounced out England like it was 2013 all over again, they sledged out Bairstow, and now England were having to deal with a PR crisis.

Yet there are reasons to believe England can wipe the smile from his face in Adelaide because this result, while one sided in numbers, was most certainly decided by very fine margins on the pitch.

Bairstow had issued a po-faced statement which did little to shine a light on what actually happened in The Avenue bar in Perth on October 29.

But Bancroft later revealed that he thought the England player “weird” but “not malicious”.

“He connected with my head,”…



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